Oops-a-daisy, didn't make it into my lecture this evening. I've got to say that I am feeling rather guilty and bad but I think I needed a bit of a calm day today. My mind feels a bit misty and I think I'm overwhelmed by last week, by the events of this week and by my future. I've given myself a bit of a guilty trip over missing a 2.5 hour lecture but I need to remember that, despite the wonderful load of total calm and well being over the past several months, I do indeed suffer from BPD and my mental health is very important.
After a period of around two months of feeling like the BPD has totally gone, it's easy to forget that I ever had it. I've been getting drastically better since October and it may well be safe to say that my BPD is a distant memory after five years of emotional disasters. But I'm careful to look after myself. MYB annoyed me for something? I tell him and we talk it through. Feeling exhausted? I take an early night. Stress with work? I moan to MYB about it and he makes me feel fabulous. With me, it's the small things that make the biggest difference to my mental health and talking things through and putting a rational spin on things is they key to my well being.
Come 3pm, once I made my mind up that I wasn't going to make it tonight, I set myself a mental list of things that would keep me sane and soothe my mind tonight. First off, I sat in the garden in the afternoon sun with a huge mug of herbal tea and my favourite book. Then I worked on an article I started typing up on Thursday evening. I spent the rest of tonight chatting with my mother, thinking about some work plans I have and reading some basic Italian. Mind sorted and it's ready to work come my lecture on Wednesday!
I've dressed for Monday afternoon sun today. I'm a typical Brit and as soon as a tiny bit of sun comes out, I'm in skirts, flats and sunglasses. The tee and heart shaped sunnies seen here are from Topshop, you'll find the skirt is available from A.P.C and the sandals are Giuseppe Zanotti. These pretty boho style earrings are from ASOS and the large cream bag is from the one and only Primark.
Monday sun. - by hollieanne on Polyvore.com