Hollie-Anne Brooks dresses for the night before.

It's the evening before my first tattoo. I sit here nervous and knowing that in 12 hours time, I'll have the numbing cream on and be ready to leave the house. The more people I tell, the more shocked people are that I'm getting inked up but when I explain the motives behind it, it all makes sense to people.

So, what is it that I'm afraid of? Well, the answer is simple- the pain! I've been scared on needles ever since I was a tiny little girl and had to get an operation. I've asked a few friends who already have little inked drawings on their bodies and I'm told to grit my teeth through it, remember why I'm getting it down and take lots of deep breaths. I'm planning on taking my iPod to drown out the sound but I think chatting away might help more and take my mind off things. I keep telling myself it'll be over in no more than half an hour. Wish me luck, eh?

I plan on trying to take a few pics (before, during and after) so I'll let you know where you can find them if it's to your taste.

The outfit I've selected today would be worn out for cocktails with friends- a few drinks to get my courage going. I have a love/hate relationship with this green suede jacket by Acne which I've paired with some Sass & Bide jeans. I love a bit of colour clashing so I've added a pochette clutch by Proenza Schouler, a ring from ASOS and some friendship bracelets by Monsoon. Finally, to finish this fierce look, some show-stopping 5.5 inch heeled sandals by Christian Louboutin.

The night before. by hollieanne featuring Christian Louboutin heels

Hollie-Anne Brooks dresses for an early night.

Apologies about yesterday, everyone! My blogging assistant kindly put out a note in my absence late last night. I got caught up in some family stuff and wasn't able to hit the laptop to blog. Huge apologies!

Anyway, shall we get back to today? If you've been reading my blog for the last few weeks, you'll notice how I've swapped casual Sundays to casual Saturdays and how much I'm really enjoying having a lazy day on a Saturday. Today was no different. A lie in followed by some lovely text messages from MYB and then I made brunch for the family. I spent the afternoon writing and listening to music, chatting to MYB and doing very little else- bliss!

I've been really stressed out this past week and it's only hitting me now how tired it's making me. MYB calmed my mind this evening and I made the decision that I needed some major relaxation. I've had a candle-lit bath tonight, had an lush salad for dinner and gave myself a pedicure. I'm now blogging from my bed and I'm going to watch some silly but slushy chick-flick in a moment. Happiness all round.

Outfit time! The outfit is casual and comfortable- and why not? The printed pink tee is DKNY and I've added some super skinny jeans by Cheap Monday. For me, the highlight of this outfit has to be the wonderful Nike Liberty dunks which I have craved since they first appeared on my screen one beautiful day. Accessories are super bright with some ASOS bangles, a hairband by New Look and a retro style Gola bag. Happy weekend!



Early night. - by hollieanne on Polyvore.com

Hollie-Anne Brooks dresses for a day of broken hearts.

Here at Dressing For HQ, we're all a bit low tonight. Tears and pouts and sighs are echoing around as everyone tries to comfort me after several super rubbish things happened today. I'm not going into details, I just want to be given a break so much.

The morning started off fine. MYB sent me some lovely morning texts to apologies for falling asleep before we had a chance to chat last night and I went out for a lovely run for a while. I ate lunch, got stuck into a wonderful project I'm working on and then, sat in my bed working and listening to Kanye West, I hear some bad news which would leave me crying for the next few hours. Devastating doesn't even come near it.

I'm so lucky to have such wonderful people around me. MYB has been a saint and I couldn't be more thankful of how he coped when I rang his office and cried down the phone to him. MYB couldn't have said nicer or more sweet things; I just really hope I haven't let him down.

But this evening got worse. Something trivial and expected but nonetheless rubbish. Let's hope tomorrow is better, eh? And I'm going to make some pancakes soon to make me feel happy inside.

Black is the main shade for this outfit. Depressing, I know, but there are some lovely colour pops which symbolise happiness and a bright future. I've used a beautiful Rick Owens tie-front leather jacket and used a Topshop printed tee underneath. The black jeans are Sass & Bide. Colour comes in the form of some incredible Brian Atwood heels, a Marc Jacobs bag and jewellery from both Topshop and Wet Seal. Happy Pancake Day!



It has been a rather bad day. - by hollieanne on Polyvore.com

Hollie-Anne Brooks dresses for an up and down day.

Friday 13th is supposed to be unlucky, right? It's all supposed to be about sadness and bad accidents and a general feeling of nerves. So why did all the bad stuff that happened to me today have an equal in some good luck?

I have had some bad luck today, it made me cry a lot, but I've had such thrilling news that I've found myself in tears of happiness. I'm not sure that's how Friday 13th is supposed to work, is it?

Bad news was in the form of my rubbish BFF cancelling on me. We were supposed to be spending Monday and Tuesday of next week together but he's had to call it all off for some reason. Cue me getting rather cross, rather angry and super emotional. And yet, my silly BFF doesn't understand why I would get upset? Er...because I care about him? Because I miss him? Because I hate being let down more than anything?

There was actually lots of good news today. There are two bits of major news but I'm afraid I cannot report on such things right now but all should be revealed by two weeks time. Other good news is perhaps more simple: finding the perfect denim skirt and having to buy it two dress sizes down from the normal size I'd pick, buying new luggage and spending a wonderful afternoon and evening being girly and giggly with my mother. Tonight will conclude with Cosmopolitan magazine and a lovely chat with MYB. MYB will probably have to suffer me moaning and bitching about my BFF for an hour but it'll be lovely all the same.

I picked two key colours for today- a black (for bad luck) and a pretty bright blue (for good luck). However, as my day has been so up and down and rather crazy, I feel this skirt by Topshop really represents my day: a total mix of madness! The shoes featured here are also by Topshop and I've gone for some blue tights from Toast. The plain black tee is H&M, this sweet blue clutch is Loyd Maish, the ring is Urban Outfitters and this incredible necklace is Burberry Prorsum. Finally, I've added a brooch which symbolises just how I feel today! Happy Friday 13th, everyone!



Up and down. - by hollieanne on Polyvore.com

Hollie-Anne Brooks dresses for super happines.

Dear Readers, I feel I may burst with happiness. Will you forgive me if I do so? Lots of love and smooches. Your Dressing For-ista, Hol xx

Do you lot ever have days where not much has happened necessarily but you're just overwhelmed with happiness? OK, so some stuff has happened. I'd love to tell but part of the pleasure is keeping it a secret between myself and the other delicious person and being wrapped up in our own little world.

Happiness, for me, is contentment. If I experience feelings of being content then I'm happy. But sometimes something, or someone, can just induce that extra pop which makes you feel so chilled-out, so blissfully happy that you'd love to bottle feeling and keep it for the days when your hair looks rank due to the rain and you feel like having a tiny cry about it (just me? Thought so!). Today is one of those days.

Actually, the past two days have been a blur of happiness and giggles and lots and lots and lots of super fabulous love. Am I making you throw up yet? This is nice for me, though. I suffer from Borderline Personality Disorder which has, in the past, pulled me to places so low that I cannot even begin to describe. I treasure these seconds, minutes, hours and days of extreme (non-mania induced) genuine happiness like you could never imagine.

I woke up late today after a very late night last night. The past few nights have been rather late ones, to be honest, but well worth every second. I spent the morning in bed relaxing and recalling the previous few nights. I often find it shocking at how happy I am, after everything with my illness, it's just a bit odd being this content and successful and happy in a way that has ZERO to do with my BPD.

Currently listening to "All Dressed Up In Love" by Jennifer Hudson and this song fits the bill for my mood today. The following outfit would be worn out to dinner with my Love, giggling about silly things as we walked into town and kissed in the freezing cold. I mentioned a while back about how much I love wearing black these days and this outfit shoes that black doesn't have to be boring. First off is a simple silk vest by Kain which I'd wear tucked into this stunning Balenciaga tiered skirt. The black tights are standard Topshop ones but look at these Louboutin babies! How stunning are they? The huge bow detailing at the back... *sigh*- perfection! I'm also drooling over this Anthony David New York bag. Jewellery adds to the classy/cool mood of this outfit. The black chain necklace is from Monsoon and the pretty pears are Forever21. The bow brooch, which I'd wear pinned into my hair, is Chanel and the ring is unmistakably also Chanel.



HAPPINESS! - by hollieanne on Polyvore.com

Hollie-Anne Brooks dresses for needing a hug.

I'm exhausted! I had a silly day which resulted in me fighting back tears as I walked to the station on my way home. Why am I never happy? The thing is, I've had a really successful day but I'm just way too competitive for my own liking.

I could really do with an MYB shaped hug, especially as seen as he was too busy to have a gossip with me last night. I had to curl up in bed with zero MYB giggles to send me off to sleep- bad times. And he hasn't text/e-mailed/called me all day! Where for art thou, MYB? Why am I suddenly in Ye Olde English times? I am cracking up with the tiredness.

I'd wear this outfit to hop in a cab over to MYB and make him hug me all night! The beautiful dress and heels are by the one and only Fendi and I've added a lust worthy Marc B bag. The feather hair clip, available from Modcloth.com, would be gently pinned into twisted hair and I'd add these Pippa Small to set the look off. Finally, a wonderful Betsey Johnson tea party ring.


I need hugs. by hollieanne

Hollie-Anne Brooks dresses for tears in class.

I've felt really close to tears all day today over a number of things but thought my tiny cry in the bath would have been it for the day. Apparently not. I felt brilliant during my usual pre-lecture Monday Starbucks but once I arrived at my lecture and realised it would be a group oral assignment, I began to get nervous.

My lecturer knows I haven't felt brilliant over the festive period so when my eyes were kept to the ground during the group chat and when I had to leave mid-sentence to go the bathroom to cry, it didn't come as a shock. I just now feel like an idiot.

MYB and I were both exhausted last night and incredibly stressed so our conversation ended up with me snapping at him and then feeling really guilty. And I guess that's why I cried today because I do feel terribly bad for snapping, even though I apologised a million times. Once more? OK, then: sorry, MYB!

My outfit for today represents that happy/sad feeling I've had with a lovely pink colour and a dark tone. I adore this shirt and wish I could feel more confident in a plaid shirt and I think this one might give me that boost. The jeans are Sass & Bide, the bag is a steal from Republic for only £14.99 and the incredible heels are Yves Saint Laurent. Finally, the earrings can be bought from Forever21, the watch is Juicy Couture and the darling ring is by Louis Vitton.


Tears. by hollieanne

Hollie-Anne Brooks dresses for seeking inspiration and researching.

Last night I had a little cry before bedtime. Yesterday was a massive day of reflection due to it being six months since a major (sad) event in my life. I found myself sitting on the sofa alone and knowing MYB (My Yummy Bloke) was out with his work lot. I got a slightly drunken text about 1230am saying he hoped I was "basically very happy"- thanks, MYB. But that was the point, I was crying because I was so happy but at the same time I was sad because I knew that I wouldn't be getting the MYB cuddles in bed of the previous night. Never mind, they'll happen again before I know it.

So, because of all the reflection and the need to make MYB shockingly proud of me, I did a stack load of research and have started to get my portfolio together. I don't come from an art/design background and I take snap-shots that always turn out really nice but it's never something I'd do professionally. I can't draw to save my life. I can't sew (and neither can MYB so if he marries me, we're hiring a tailor). But I can write. And style. And do a bit of pouting which all ends up inspiring me.

Today I am inspired by the following: MYB and I disagreeing on whether Nick Lacey is an idiot or not, Carina Round, MYB's blog post about Sheffield inspiring him, girls from Norway asking my advice, the end of Woolworths' Pick and Mix, sitting on MYB's bed in a long silk nightdress and a cardigan. The latter especially. "It's very decedent, I know" he says as he sips champagne in bed with me. We disagree on Nick Lacey but decadence is never out of the question.

I am a simple things girl. Cupcakes, a new nail paint, digital radios- they do it for me. I am the girl who complies a guinea pig squeak, cookie dough, "Music is Power" by Richard Ashcroft, MYB's love of Zara, walks in the cold and an insatiable need to pop out ideas for selling a brand and turns them into her world. The idea of creating a massive portfolio to impress some of the top universities in the country sort of terrifies me; how do I take the tiny things and turn them into one big thing? I'm sure I'll do it. Tiny steps and all...

With spending most of the day at my desk (laptop, blogs, books, magazines...) I need a sweet little outfit that'll be comfortable but inspire me to create and I think I've managed it here. This Forever21 tee is so cute and I can well imagine my best friend popping it in my stocking this Christmas. The beige Chloé skirt is an office staple, as are the Louboutin flats. Accessories wise I've gone for a sweet bobble hat from Topshop, a vintage bag, a brooch from Urban Outfitters and the most wonderful tea bracelet by Hannah Zakari.



Inspire and research. by hollieanne



Finally, a picture of one of my Christmas gifts from MYB because it is simply the love of my life:

Hollie-Anne Brooks dresses for doing everything wrong!

I am going to cry. I'm actually going to cry. I keep doing everything wrong today and very little is working out.

Today didn't start off bad, I had a lazy morning and headed into town for Starbucks where I had a major flirt with a rather fit bloke who passed me his number (I love MYB, yes I do, no matter how fit he was....yes, MYB). I then skipped off to two meeting which went incredibly well, especially the latter.

I was on a major high and sat down to read some stuff about broadcasting and children. I was sitting there happily when I went to pay for a book and realised I couldn't find my bank card. I paid by cash and went and sat down to sort out my Paddington, knowing my card would be in there somewhere. But it wasn't. Thus I have no bank card and therefore no money. I went back to Starbucks (the last place I had it) and they didn't have it. A bloke in a red (red!) jumper then informed me I probably wouldn't get a new one by Xmas. Yeah, Mate, I got that. I walked out and had to stop myself crying really hard.

I text MYB to tell him about the situation and he called pretty much straight away and was all protective and sensible and reminded me to cancel my current one for fear of online use by some idiot. MYB scored some major Brownie points for being so sensible and protective today- well done, Love!

But what is it with buses? I was still close to tears when I started queuing for my bus home only to wait half a bloody hour because it decided not to turn up.

Then I slipped over on ice.

And now I've only gone and tagged MYB in some photos on Facebook for him to de-tag himself and now I'm all paranoid about whether he's mad at me or not for even doing so. I am on a major feeling sorry for myself night. I need a bath with a Lush bath bomb, perhaps a tiny cry and a call from MYB to tell me he hearts me. Yes, a cry is needed.

This outfit is mainly black, a colour I hardly wear but wear really well. I fell in love with this Topshop skirt and was actually surprised to see where it's from. On top I've gone for a pattern clash with Debenhams polkadot cardigan and the shoes are kept simple with suede flats by J-Crew. The American Eagel adds colour and another pattern mix and the Yves Saint Laurent bag just adds such a touch of luxury; I think it's defiantly in my top 5 designer bags of all time. Finally, a very sweet little Miss Selfridge snake bangle which I adore. Time to hit eBay for the aforementioned bangle, I think!



I keep doing everything wrong! by hollieanne

Hollie-Anne Brooks dresses for having zero patience.

OK, MYB, I get that you have to work late sometimes but three nights in a row? No thanks. And it's not just that, it's the way he hardly bothers to tell me he's staying late or even considers how that might make me feel. MYB is a typical metro-sexual bloke but clearly that means he's like 99% of other men and is lacking in the consideration field.

I shouldn't complain, I know, he works really hard and does an amazing job but sometimes I can't help but get really cross when it's hitting 11pm and my boyfriend is still on his way home as I'm about to fall fast asleep. I guess the worst thing is that I've been asking him to do something for a week and he still hasn't bothered. Jesus, nag much?

I went out for dinner tonight and had the first mulled wine of the season- nothing like it! I had dinner and laughed and chatted about silly things like men and relationships and friendships. It was fun. And it involved Dime Bar cheesecake- yum!

But to truly stress having lost my patience with MYB and starting to become quite furious, I've gone all red. Red symbolises my anger but also my passion at knowing that as soon as he calls me sweetheart tonight, I'll fall into his arms and realise I'm actually with the hottest bloke I have ever met. Double yum! I've gone for a double dose of Fendi love with this beautiful red dress and amazingly high heels. Next is the Bottega Veneta quilted clutch which pretty much proves why I love the label so much. Finally, jewellery comes in the form of an amazing cocktail ring, some pretty earrings and a fab Marc by Marc Jacobs bangle.


Cross. by hollieanne

Hollie-Anne Brooks dresses for being fine.

"I'll be fine, I'll be fine. No, really, I will". I keep telling myself this and it shocks me how much the low mood on today has crept up on me after the joy of yesterday but that's the way it goes, right? Especially when you have BPD.

I'm a creature who is both amused and saddened by the little things. A cupcake at the Hummingbird Bakery, wearing a corsage, seeing MYB stand at the bar and order cocktails for the two of us...bliss! Not having an umbrella when it's raining, getting a question wrong in class, running late for an appointment... floods of tears. I ain't by half one sensitive soul, really.

I guess that's what it is today, isn't it? I just keep welling up with tears over the smallest reasons on earth and am having to tell myself to stay calm and stop being silly. Perhaps it's all just part of being a girl? Or maybe I am just a simple creature.

I could do with the biggest cuddle from MYB though. There's something about that man where, as soon as I'm in his company, I just feel warm and snuggly and safe. He's better that caramel hot chocolate which tends to have the same effect on me.

Dressing For is today about being in between; about needing a little cry and a huge smile. I'd wear this to go for a walk with MYB and then back to his for a few tiny tears, lots of massive cuddles and scribbling down my feature ideas as he did some work. Purple is the main colour of today as it's that in between colour, it can be happy but it can also be sad. We're sort of in the middle today but how could you not be happy with these purple sequin Converse on? I'm actually in love with them. And to me, there's not really much more comfort that pairing some smart wide-leg trousers with a pair of Converse so I've used these ones by Oscar de la Renta. Keep the happiness theme with this super cute Disney tee and, because they always make me smile, wear some pretty Pucci ear muffs. Continuing with the purple theme, I've used a pretty Miu Miu bow scarf and one of my favourite handbags ever- the patent purple Mulberry Bayswater. Stay happy!



I am fine. by hollieanne

Hollie-Anne Brooks dresses for stress.

I actually feel as if I am going to cry and never stop. But I don't even feel sad, I just feel super stressed.

I have assignments spilling out my ears, group work to co-ordinate, ideas which are not being listened to, a UCAS form to fully finish, an application to FIT in New York to sort out AND a weekend cuddle session with MYB to finalise. Do I feel sorry for myself? Yes I do!

I guess that's the thing with being stressed, isn't it? You try and take a little time out for it all to unwind but all you end up talking about is how stressed you are which makes you realise just how much there is to do. Take tonight for example, I was out for dinner with friends and although they understood my stress related rant fully, I felt bad for going on about rather depressing stuff. I know I should have a boiling hot bath with bubbles, take some magazines and a book to bed, have a square of chocolate and call MYB and have a little cry but I just can't- there's too much to do!

And I swear, if MYB can't do this weekend and help his girl relax then I shall be rather crossed. And even more stressed.

Hmm, so the outfit for today is blue. I feel blue a little but blue is also a really calming colour. My mother and I both adore this sweet Kirstin Davis for Belk blouse. It's so sweet! Pair with some skinny jeans by 7 For All Mankind and some pretty silver jewellery. Finally, add darker shades with some suede blue flats and a bag available from La Garconne. Take a deep breath. Everything will be fine...


Stress. by hollieanne