Hollie-Anne Brooks dresses for birthday tea with her father.

I'm heading off to the land of love for my birthday thus I'm catching up with friends and family this week. Tonight, it was the turn of my father. I rushed home from lectures, dismissing the pleasure of drinks with friends, and made sure I looked fabulous and had something equally as fabulous in the oven.

My father didn't offer to take me out tonight. My father asked me if I'd make him tea, I said yes because I hate to argue. I popped a quick dinner in the oven and slipped into a pretty dress, my tattoo looking beautiful as it sat on my arm and reminded me how proud I should be of myself.

When my father arrived, we sat down and drank tea and he looked appalled at my quirk on my arm (although later got used to it and loved it). I served dinner at the table and we continued talking- but that was the problem.

My dad drained me tonight. All he went on about was Muffin Top, booking an expensive holiday with Muffin Top and er...Muffin Top! He went on and on about getting in trouble at work, almost being proud of the fact. My father always has been a mess, he has nothing to his name but a car and half a dozen items of clothing. I don't feel sorry for him, he doesn't put himself across as a sad man, but I do feel cross. Why do people feel they can mumble through life without any stability and normality? Call me middle-class if you will.

I'm off to bed soon, happy in the knowledge that tomorrow night is my birthday dinner with my mother and step-family. My father gave me cash and a card, both of wish I don't need.

I've made up a stunning outfit for today. If my father has to put me down, I may as well look stylish as he does so. I've picked this stunning dress by Thurley which is a clear show stopper wherever worn. I've colour clashed the outfit with a turquoise Pucci clutch and jewellery by Bijoux. The pretty hair comb is designed by Salcome, the sandals are by Azzedine Alaia and the look is finished with a Topshop ring.

Birthday tea with my father. by hollieanne featuring Emilio Pucci clutches

Hollie-Anne Brooks dresses for the night before.

It's the evening before my first tattoo. I sit here nervous and knowing that in 12 hours time, I'll have the numbing cream on and be ready to leave the house. The more people I tell, the more shocked people are that I'm getting inked up but when I explain the motives behind it, it all makes sense to people.

So, what is it that I'm afraid of? Well, the answer is simple- the pain! I've been scared on needles ever since I was a tiny little girl and had to get an operation. I've asked a few friends who already have little inked drawings on their bodies and I'm told to grit my teeth through it, remember why I'm getting it down and take lots of deep breaths. I'm planning on taking my iPod to drown out the sound but I think chatting away might help more and take my mind off things. I keep telling myself it'll be over in no more than half an hour. Wish me luck, eh?

I plan on trying to take a few pics (before, during and after) so I'll let you know where you can find them if it's to your taste.

The outfit I've selected today would be worn out for cocktails with friends- a few drinks to get my courage going. I have a love/hate relationship with this green suede jacket by Acne which I've paired with some Sass & Bide jeans. I love a bit of colour clashing so I've added a pochette clutch by Proenza Schouler, a ring from ASOS and some friendship bracelets by Monsoon. Finally, to finish this fierce look, some show-stopping 5.5 inch heeled sandals by Christian Louboutin.

The night before. by hollieanne featuring Christian Louboutin heels

Hollie-Anne Brooks dresses for the start of the birthday week.

My birthday is one week away. On Sunday May 3rd, I'll turn a year older and I'm welcoming a new and beautiful stage into my life. My birthday plans are unsorted at the moment but I always struggle with unhappy memories of birthdays past (hi, rubbish father running away and getting engaged to his mistress on my birthday) and therefore a huge party has never been to my taste. I think I'll go out for lunch and then stay in with some birthday cake, DVDs and an extra load of cuddles from my love. I look forward to it.

Yesterday, my mother ruined my brown rice and grilled fish healthy week by taking me out for lunch and, with my parents split and friends all over the place, this week is going to be a busy one. Tomorrow, however, I have the day alone and plan to rest and write before the formalities of birthday teas and champagne cocktails take over.

My mother took me out to purchase my birthday gift today. A shiny new iPhone. It's so pretty! I'm an e-mail addict and all my work is organised by e-mail now that I'm living in the North so having access to my inbox is a must for me. I fear the iPhone will make me even more of a work-a-holic but at the same time, I'm hearting the Elle Canada application with fashion news updates- nice one! So, for those of you who have an iPhone, what are your favourite apps and how has the iPhone changed your life so far?

This time in 48 hours I'll have my tattoo- eeek!

The outfit I've picked for today would be worn to a pre-birthday lunch followed by sitting in the garden with cups of tea and lots of gossip. All the items featured here are certainly on my birthday wish-list, MYB- take note! This stunningly simple pleated dress in a flattering shade is by Viktor and Rolf, I've added a Topshop bracelet, Juicy Couture necklace and a Roberto Cavalli ring to really give it that 'wow' factor. These beautiful shoes featured are Yves Saint Laurent and I've used this ostrich bag from one of my favourite labels of all time, Bottega Veneta.

The start of the birthday week. by hollieanne featuring Yves Saint Laurent heels

Hollie-Anne Brooks dresses for booking her tattoo.

Oh my god, can you believe I just typed that? Can you believe I'm getting a tattoo on Tuesday at noon? My word. But speaking of believe, that's exactly what my tattoo shall be. Perfectly inked on my wrist, the word 'believe' will sit there as a reminder of the ups and downs of life and the most treasured phrase repeated by my mother: "Believe in yourself and believe things will get better".

Now, as I sit with my happy ending in the form of the most beautiful man alive and a career I totally adore, I trust her words more than ever. I do realise I'll always have a struggle with BPD but now- several months after feeling content and calm and as if BPD never existed- I know how to deal with it. I take every single minute as a treasure- I shouldn't be sitting here today- and I adore life, even if that just means reading the newspaper on my journey home.

I think self belief and belief in those around you is the most important value in life. You give up when you stop believing and, in an evening last June, I really did give up. But with the help of my mother, best friend, my darling man and those other people around me, I am now the most content girl alive. Perhaps this entry comes across as me gushing with happiness, even being smug, but I know a lot of you who read this blog can really understand what I mean by all this.

But, as many of my friends are thinking, what is this typical middle-class girl getting a tattoo for? Surely, the girl who votes Conservative and cannot wait to get married is against inking herself up? It's surprised me too, I must say, but it was my mother who suggested it and I want to give something positive back to my body which has dealt with so much psychical abuse in the past.

Finally, before we get onto the outfit, I'd like to say a HUGE thank-you to all who read the comment and contact with such lovely words. This is the 200th entry and Dressing For is my baby. The blog means a lot to me and the best thing is hearing all your sweet comments. I'm glad a lot of you get a lot out of Dressing For, I certainly do too!

Fashion o'clock? Go on then! I've picked this sweet 3/4 length sleeve striped dress from French Connection- it would really show off my little addition to my wrist. With it, I've added an Yves Saint Laurent chunky gold necklace, a ring by Forever21 and a rope bracelet from ae.com . The red sunglasses featured here can be found at fredflare.com , the cute nautical inspired bag is by APC Madras and costs £91 and, finally, these classic sandals are designed by the wonderful Sigerson Morrison.

It's booked! by hollieanne featuring Forever21 rings